Hey Graffiti Artists:
My carpet is not a canvas for your red acrylic paint and red markers; the walls in the toddler’s room do not need a touch of brown and pink crayon; the kitchen counters are granite and do not need to be enhanced with baby blue chalk; and, if you continue to color your legs green to look like the Hulk, you will continue to wear jeans in 95 degree weather to cover up what you call body art and what the softball moms would call bad parenting.
So, Guerilla Children, I have used OxiClean, Spot Shot and Magic Erasers for the last time; the companies have denied my requests for stock options based on my high-volume purchases, so I am doing the rational thing and stifling your artistic tendencies. All paint, chalk, crayons, markers, pencils and pens have been hidden. Time to go find a new way to express yourself; I hear music is cathartic and non-messy.
Sincerely,
Your Mother, a supporter of the arts anywhere but on my stuff
