“November Fourth is National Candy Day. We could celebrate by donating our kids’ leftover Halloween candy. What do you think?” asked the goodhearted mother of four.
Waiting, waiting…okay, I am ready. Crack a smile or lay the punch line on me. Nope. Nothing. She is serious. She has lost her mind and wants to give away candy—my candy, well my kids' hard-earned candy—four days after Halloween, the second best candy holiday in the realm of candy holidays. It is only second behind Easter due to the quality. Cadbury Eggs and Russell Stover Easter Eggs are made from a far superior type of milk chocolate than your run-of-the-mill Kit Kats and Hershey’s Milk Chocolate Bars that are frequently dispensed on Halloween night.
“You look pale? You don’t like the idea, do you?” she asked.
How do I tell someone so smart, energetic and positive that her idea might be the most asinine plan I have heard since Prince recorded 20Ten and decided to not release it in the United States. At this moment, this candy initiative is making Prince look like a business mastermind.
“What kind of person gives their own candy away? Why would I do that? Why would anyone do that? I am afraid I cannot endorse a service project that involves the sacrifice of any sugar-related items. Let’s just donate gloves or pencils or something, ” I said with a positive and supportive “let’s go team” attitude.
Yes, my candy is safe. However, I like the idea of telling my kids that we are going to donate their candy. I’ll say we are giving it to old people so they can have few morsels of delight before they croak. This is a much better option than “the tooth fairy stole it to protect your teeth.” Last year, my son did not believe that the State Legislature of Dentists mandated a three pieces of candy per child per month law. He threatened to Google it; I threatened to take away cake, cookies and brownies away too. He dropped his challenge, and I safely tucked the remaining Halloween candy into my underwear drawer. Yes, the candy donation story is a much more believable story, and I’ll be celebrating national Candy Day with a nice drawer full of candy.
National Candy Day is my new favorite candy holiday.
Author’s Note: After I had 24 hours to recover from the idea that anyone would be willing to give away their stash of candy, I actually think it is a pretty good idea. There are number charities that accept donated candy, so I’ll be passing on details soon once I find local options. Stayed tuned and if you are feeling extra generous there is a garbageman’s daughter out there who is accepting any and all candy donations.
